Month: July 2012

friendship, inspiration, life lessons, love, mindfulness, motivation

Stand By Me

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There has been some activity about a YouTube video that was recently posted showing the murder of a Mideastern woman named Najibia.  I haven’t seen the clip – my cowardice and horror renders me incapable of watching it.  That said, I have been told that it reveals members of the Taliban cheering and supporting her husband as he repeatedly shot her in the back of the head.  His reason?  Her ‘crime’?  There are no reasons one can conceive of;  there was no crime, for there was no mention of a trial.  To carry my sorrow one step farther, this murder was committed in the name of a religion.  It’s important to note up front that this isn’t a diatribe about the Taliban, one specific culture, etc.  It is about the reiterative chorus in the face of unspeakable acts as justifiable by religious belief.

I’m not sufficiently well-versed to write about religion.  My spiritual view is both simplistic and I’m sure there are those who feel I am wrong.  I know of no religion that isn’t predicated on love, grace and humanity.  I am not suggesting that there isn’t significant brutality in religious and global history – though each example underscores a lesson that we were intended to learn and can’t seem to permanently absorb.  We keep repeating ourselves.  Whether acts of cruelty are defined as acceptable by gender, sect, interpretation – we watch as people continue to be brutally killed, forced to act against their will, hearts mutilated by memories.

I don’t have answers – I can feel inadequate in my corner of the world, consciously ensuring that I walk gently on this earth and embrace love as a spiritual expectation that I honor.  And I know it isn’t enough.  I have to consider ways to do more.  And I have to remember that without hope, there’d be no miracle of another sunrise and another opportunity.

You may remember this video as part of a documentary “Playing For Change – Peace Through Music”.  It lifts us up to look in the mirror and see the best reflection of ourselves, it underscores that we are all composing this song as we go along.  And though we may not read from the same notes, love is as universal as ignorance.  And there perhaps is where God resides – in the longings of our heart.

friendship, inspiration, life lessons, love, mindfulness, music, parenting

In My Dream Last Night

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I think I’ve mentioned that I used to sing to my sons each night after stories and before bed (and before they would start goofing around with each other, climbing up and down the bunk bed, “Mommy, he won’t stay in his bed”, “Tell him to be quiet”, “Mommy?  Mommy? MOOOOOOOOM!!!”).  They typically picked ‘When You Wish Upon A Star’ or ‘Somewhere Over The Rainbow’.  I dreamed about this last night.  Their bedroom was decorated in a way that I wish I could have afforded, the lighting was different than the reality.  But those boys?  They looked as magical as little boys do, smelled of Johnson & Johnson shampoo, and were fetching in their He-Man pajamas.  I woke up with a wet pillow that I was holding so tightly I didn’t recognize at first what it was.  But I’m very glad it wasn’t a kid – I would’ve smothered him (or awoke to some serious screaming).

When Aaron and Theresa married last year, he and I met on the dance floor for ‘our’ dance.  And he whispered in my ear, “Mom, I’m gonna get you”…He did, he does,  he always will..

Wishing you a tranquil kinda Tuesday…

discretion, friendship, inspiration, life lessons, love, mindfulness, motivation

Love The Fool

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A lesson for today – at least for me.  I am guilty certainly of being foolish, feeling more than is good for me (sometimes I see the world only in primary colors, which can give you a migraine after a while), suffering my losses and not acknowledging my wins.  There are days when I cry over  nothing, my emotional strength sapped and my ability to get out of my way completely ineffective.

Conversely, when I am wrapped in joy – as one would be a really fabulous terry cloth robe – I don’t think about it as something to cherish, to protect or celebrate.  I delight in the moment, and do little to protect it from the harsher judgments that may later follow.  My friend Lori calls it the little green monster that jumps up and down on her shoulder, whispering the words of self-doubt and harsh judgments that can force us into a box we don’t want to enter.  I love her visual – and imagine that mine is more like a hyperactive Captain Hook (parrot included).  Regardless – they do the same damage – not just to your shoulder, but to your psyche.

What saves us from ourselves?  The delicious reality that we are – all of us – silly, frightened, impulsive sometimes and thoughtful other times, heroic in our hopes and dreams and timid when taking our first steps in a new direction.  We break – our exteriors not necessarily reflecting all the cracks that we have re-glued and secured with sufficient emotional scar tissue.

As I have written about protecting the child within us, so too must we tip our hat to the wondrous fool that should not be silenced, or diminished or devalued by our ever-present voice of  ‘should have, didn’t, and can’t’.  Would we react to our days differently if we cherished the fool with the same reverence with which we listen to our Capt. Hook?  If we remembered that both sides of who we are are of equal value and worth?

friendship, humor, inspiration, life lessons, love, mindfulness, music

Making It Mine

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Lucky for me, this song came up on my iPod at the gym this morning.  Typically, the music I listen to while working out is not this mellow, so I’m convinced that this was not serendipity – I needed to hear it.  There is little that moves me like music – and those who know me recognize that this has been my ‘go to’ since I was a child.  It can drive my mood, steer my thoughts, set my course for the day (far better than any GPS).

In my office at the firm, there was always something playing in the background.  People would come in just to hear what genre was moving my moments.  And there is really nothing I don’t like, which makes picking favorites difficult – although I do have certain people and bands that get a heavier rotation than others.

Something about the words to this song, the visual of hanging out at the ‘gratitude cafe’…hearing angels sing a chorus that’s just exuberant.  My only wish is that I posted this earlier this morning, with the hope that you heard this as part of your day’s beginning.  That it made you feel good.  My plan?  To make sure I make this day mine.  Let me know what you think…

friendship, humor, inspiration, life lessons, love, mindfulness

What Would You Say To Yourself?

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I watched this video this morning, and began to wonder what I would say to my twelve-year-old self.  My first thoughts were “the bullying will stop”, “you’ll get better looking”, “you’ll never use advanced math so don’t worry about it”…I think I would also advise myself that some things will also get worse,  hurts change, though they hurt just as much.  Perhaps I would be philosophical and suggest that time is going to accelerate at some point, that no season is really as long as it seems.  I wonder if I would think I was just another obnoxious twelve-year-old, self-righteous and theatrical.  I don’t think I would have sought much advice, for I always felt like I was getting too much of it anyway.

The truth of the matter is, I talk to the kid inside me all the time.  It’s where certain adult wounds cut deepest, for there don’t seem to be the right kind of band-aids, where my greatest feelings of inadequacy are under-protected despite my years of learning how to hide them.   I am certain I wasn’t as prescient as this guy was as a twelve-year-old boy, to even think of making a video before videos were ubiquitous.

So I pose the question to you – if you had the chance to talk to your twelve-year-old self – is there anything you would want to say?

friendship, humor, life lessons

Steamy Saturday A.M.

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The sun is going to rise in a little while, and rather than inviting us outside, will be daring us to see how long we can remain in her company.  We will see each other in brief spurts today, for I do better with relationships when the intensity knob is not always set on ‘high’.  Lately she’s been giving me a lot of heat, taking my sweat and blistering my flowers.  I think that gorgeous orb has a bone to pick with us and she’s making sure we know it.

For those of you who are spending your Saturdays with this uncensored communique from the sun, I hope your day includes cool air, wonderful music, maybe a good read and a nap, laughter and love..always love.

 

friendship, inspiration, life lessons, mindfulness

One More Time, Happily

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Yesterday I did a really stupid thing (I do stupid things on a fairly frequent basis) – I looked at my blog stats.  It was interesting to me that I have more followers than I ever thought I’d have, more ‘likes’, more comments, etc…And yet, the number of people who check out the blog on a daily basis has gone down since the crazy days of May and early June.  It bothered me – albeit briefly.  I realized that the select group of people who really do visit, are those who  have become incredibly important to me.  People who I look forward to reading and hearing from.  I anxiously await their perspectives, smile when I see their name in my inbox and welcome them with invisible hugs which are so strong, I wouldn’t be surprised if on occasion, you felt it – wherever you are.  So damn the numbers – I have some inspiring, smart, funny, humble, insecure, confident, fretful, contented, beautiful friends (even those who would argue the last point with me – you should know by now, not to do that).

And so it was ironic and timely, that my buddy Rhonda – the glorious writer of HelpMeRhonda.com accorded me with this Reader Appreciation award.  Rhonda’s writing is a sensory treat – for it is more than the written word that is eloquently placed.  She informs her work with passion and zeal, her pictures burst with color, her laughter audible even though we are states and states removed from each other.  When you laugh with Rhonda, you laugh with your belly, and should she be having a day with tears, I find them streaming down my cheeks as well.  She knows me well – and prefaced this award with a quick message which acknowledged that she wasn’t going to call on me for one of these awards, but…

So I want to thank my friend Rhonda – for the generous praise which I don’t deserve, but will work to earn – but more importantly for her exquisite timing.  I’ve become part of a small, close, transparent community – though all that I can see of it is with my heart.