An Ode To Entomology

If my thinking is incorrect I offer an apology

I am told the study of bugs is known as entomology

So if that’s true I’m wondering where all those experts are

For the marmorated stink bug has returned from fields afar

 

They’re clinging to the screened porch and the doors that lead outside

The windows are no safer, for into their seams they hide

They’re propagating with ferocity, their will to live intense

The bugzooka has been broken with its suction rife with dents

I’m thoroughly disgusted, by their armor and their shell

By their asserted squatters’ rights which are making my life hell

Please Β understand it’s viral, like an insect form of MRSA

These bugs are killing my morale instead of vice versa

88 thoughts on “An Ode To Entomology

  1. I am sorry for the invasion and the havoc it brings with it and while they are quite ugly and I feel for you – I do – your ode makes me smile. Perhaps buy a cheap bottle of toilet water to combat them. My version of fighting fire with fire. Wishing you luck and wishing I was there to aide you in your mission (should you decide to accept it). What a visual – the two of us, dressed in combat garb, versus an army of stink bugs! πŸ™‚

    • There is NO way I’m going to suit up with you to fight these insurgents. And if you saw them in their abundant glory, you wouldn’t put on any Private Benjamin gear either – it just makes you feel like they’re crawling all over..;-)

      • Point well-made my dearest friend. Maybe after a bottle, or two, of wine they’ll look more attractive πŸ˜‰ And, that’s a visual I like – each of us with our own bottle and a straw. Miss you.

  2. If only you could slay them with your words…because, wow, now it’s me in awe of your rhyming prose! And oh my are you right, they are gross ! I like your friend Jo’s idea…cheap bottle of toilet water, combat garb and then get a nice bottle of vino for the after party. Oh I hope they depart soon… xoxo

    • I would like to drown them in Jean Nate!! But they are so gross, I wouldn’t imagine anyone I know willing to do battle with these yucksters. It’s insane..I never look forward to cold weather but we need a b-i-g chill..xox

  3. OMG Jean Nate..that’s hilarious!! I never look forward to cold weather – either. Ever.
    We will hit 99 this week though, so at least a cool down would be nice…but never cold. Ok sending bug flying thoughts your way… xoxo

  4. My father’s undergraduate degree was in chemistry and his graduate degree was in entomology. He spent the bulk of his career in the agricultural chemical business. Yes, pesticides, back in the days when we all still loved them πŸ˜‰ Were he alive, he’d be happy to tell you what to use to get rid of your problem. He had an odd sort of love/hate relationship with bugs.

    • It hasn’t even gone up yet I don’t think!! But thank you friend, thank you. I still think it’s strange that there is even a path from stinkbugs to Freshly Pressed . But I’ll take it! And am happily surprised!

  5. That what was fun. Thank you. I love the photo at the bottom too. I hadn’t seen a stinkbug in decades. I guess you got them all. Thank you for that too. And my condolences. Good luck in encouraging them to go visit someone else.

    Russ

  6. Having the same problem only indoors with carpet beetles. The carpet is fine. They eat old books, have lots, and my expensive wool thread for the next beautiful hand knitted sweater. I have to keep the yarn in the freezer. The spray will probably kill me before they are gone. There’s no way I could write a poem about them. Anybody have ideas for their demise?

    • I wish I had some ideas..Though Andy did spray the hell out of the porch with some success.. Carpet beetles, huh? They sound equally distasteful. I can’t abide by guests arriving unannounced with no intention of leaving.

  7. “The windows are no safer, for into their seams they hide.” Gah, so true. I once opened my bedroom window and a boatload fell onto my bed. The horror!
    Great poem by the way πŸ™‚

    • Oh that’s just wrong…on so many levels. How presumptuous of them to think it would be acceptable to fall onto your bed! Another reason for my disdain. πŸ˜‰

  8. What an ode! My husband is an entomologist and I hear about stinkbugs almost to ad nauseum! I have to send him a link to this. My office was overrun with them last week. They look like something from Mad Max as they careen around the room. Great fresh press!

    • Thank you so much!! I wonder if these stink bugs are driving him as crazy as they’re driving me!! I think your analogy is great – they do look like they spilled out of a Mad Max movie.

  9. Moth moth why doth thou both er me so? O! I know! You flitter in my lights you flutter like little manic kites round and round without a sound you eat my clothes why doth thou so compound my woes?

  10. Such a funny and tasteful way to express that “grossed out” sensation we all feel when we see a hoard of bugs approaching! Is it just me, or have their been more bugs this year due to the hot weather?

    • Thank you – and that feeling is truly gross, you’re so right! It sure seems like there have been more bugs around this summer. And though I love the summer, I am prompted to shout ‘come on fall’!

    • Really?? Stinkbugs are good omens? OMG!! Thanks Sharon! But really, if they portend all good things, I need no more bugs – we are clearly rife with good tidings! Hugs, m

      • Hehehe…oh my dear Mimi, reading back my comment to you, it does sound like I had wished another truckload of bugs on your door!!! πŸ˜€ Oh no never!! I was trying to sound poetic *roll eyes* and draw the analogy that just as you’ve been visited by a torrent of bugs, my wish is that this blog will be visited by an even greater crowd of readers blessed by you. HUGS, Sharon

  11. Mimi, I missed this one and this is the one the FP fairies chose! I was WONDERING when they would finally find you!!!! I like this post, but I love reading your widsom on a daily basis. Congrats on the FP, my friend!! πŸ™‚

  12. Pingback: 4:29 am. And, Inspired… – Lead.Learn.Live.

  13. Pingback: Ligo Circle of Appreciation | LargeSelf

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