Category: inspiration

humor, inspiration, life lessons, work life

Ode To The Indifferent

mimijk

I spend a lot of time writing about work, life, finding your rhythm and remaining engaged in the dance.  Well, I think I owe the under-achievers among us a sincere, heart-felt apology.  I mean, what if you don’t want to be regarded as an outstanding contributor?  What if you don’t want Tony Robbins to change your life (well, he doesn’t do much for me either, so let’s move on)?  What if you just want to get by, listen to ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ over and over again, hide under the desk until everyone’s left the office and then sneak out?  What if you see mediocrity as the goal, and barely-getting-by as the preferred course of action?  How have I helped you???  I fear, not at all.

Well, that changes today.  Yes, this is a bit self-serving for I always hope to expand my readership.  Of greater importance though is the transference of information I have gleaned over the years which may help you in your quest to achieve nothing while still receiving a paycheck.  I believe in you – you can do this.  All it takes is a minimal amount of effort.  Try the following:

–  As often as possible, tell as many people as possible how busy you are.  There are surprisingly very few folks in the workplace who realize that if you are able to talk about how busy you are, you’re probably not – so this is a pretty safe bet.

–  Suck up to your boss.  It isn’t necessary that you know exactly why you think s/he is terrific; no need to comment about skills of which you know nothing.  Just make sure you give  him/her sufficient ‘atta boys’ and ‘I’m with you’ and ‘I swear, I don’t know how you do it’ to make them feel your investment (even if you and I both know that your investment is de minimus).

–  Learn how to toggle from Facebook or YouTube to your work screens with incredible alacrity.  If you really want to achieve nothing, this is a critical skill that is worth spending some time developing.

–  Always offer to help others in your department – and then graciously explain that you would if you could, but you’re under the gun and won’t be able to assist right now.  Assure your colleagues that you’ll be there for them next time.  If you do this often enough, ‘next time’ will take care of itself.

–  Don’t engage in any gossip about your company and/or your boss.  The idea is to draw as little attention to yourself as possible – this one is a no-brainer.

–  Dress appropriately – by that I mean lots of beige, grey, ‘greige’ – anything that can help you get lost in the background of the office.

–  In team meetings, you should occasionally yell out “I was just going to suggest that!” when someone comes up with an idea that is met with enthusiasm.  Don’t do this too often, for you could appear more interested in what is going on than you really are, and we all know where that can lead.

–  Show up.  I actually had an employee tell me that she deserved her paycheck just because she showed up every day.  If she happened to do any work, that was icing.  True, she didn’t last very long but that’s another story.  Try not to get the flu on Thursday nights or Sundays – it’s too obvious.

Ok my friends, this was just a beginning.  I’m hoping others can add to this list.  If you find inertia difficult – just keep trying.  You know what they say – ‘If at first you don’t succeed, you’re about average’.  Keep on not keeping on!!!

anxiety, humor, inspiration, life lessons, mindfulness, motivation, training

A Very Happy Anniversary Of Sorts

mimijk

On March 31st, I celebrated my first year of ‘retirement’.  I put the term in quotes, because I don’t know that the word ‘retired’ is applicable – if you scramble the letters around, I think you get to a more appropriate description of my state of mind – ‘tireder’ and/or ‘retried’.  I had grown more and more tired of trying to retain a culture and philosophy that in an evolving firm had become outdated and probably to some, pretty hokey.  I had tried too often to excite senior management about employee engagement, accountability, career development, and the joys of communicating in any manner that didn’t require technology.  At the risk of redundancy, I was so flippin’ lucky – I worked in a firm that embraced me and my crazy commitment until I realized that it was time for me to pack it in.  I wasn’t going to be able to contribute anymore – the train was pulling out of the station and I chose not to buy a ticket.

But – it’s still an anniversary.  I should get a  present or something (note to self – talk to husband).  It’s been a year of tremendous growth, with incredible highs coming from places I would never have expected and dark blues that I hadn’t anticipated which gripped some days with vice-like intensity.  I’ve learned that retirement doesn’t separate you from your convictions (I know, big duh if you’ve been reading my blog) – I still care as passionately about the principles I followed when I was working full-time.  I’ve learned that you are not going to be defined by what you did for a living but how you lived while you were working.  Over the course of this past year, I’m sure I have been vilified and canonized – perhaps even at the same time, remembered fondly and with derision – that is the territory of all who have experienced extended employment tenure.  And I’ve learned that it really doesn’t matter – what counts is my continued love and commitment to the people who have remained my friends.

I discovered that working independently is both freeing and lonely.  A side benefit of going to work each day is having people to engage with, who are also struggling with intense workloads and challenges as well as lives outside of work that they are struggling to stay connected to.  The transition from 200 emails in my inbox each morning that required me to accelerate from 0 to 60 pre-coffee, to coffee and the paper first with no rush to get out the door wasn’t easy (though I have come to LOVE it).  Connected to that intensity was the implicit need that others had for me in one way or shape or form, and I liked that.  Finding a new rhythm was a challenge – knowing I had a groove, but not knowing where the hell I was supposed to dance.  Consulting has provided an excellent segue for me – allowing me the freedom of self-exploration with the structure of developing meaningful programs and training opportunities.  It’s also given me time to hang with my kids who are local (when they’re not working or with their spouses), go to the gym, make some new friends, be a better friend to my old friends, and continue to fight with a bit more focus on a body that keeps throwing me medical surprises and loops for which I’m never prepared.  That old Faces song “Oh La La” reprises in my head “I wish that I knew what I know now/When I was younger”…

Finally I have learned that there are phenomenally talented, generous people out there in Bloggerland who teach me something new every time I read their posts, share a conversation online or exchange a ‘shout out’ in appreciation for their tremendous efforts.  These virtual friends evoke very real emotions within me – I celebrate their success, try to answer the questions they pose of their readers, laugh, etc.  Sometimes it feels like there’s lots of virtual hugging going on – and quite honestly, long may it continue.  These writers have inspired and humbled me.  When I started this in mid-January, I had no idea what I was doing.  I still don’t – but now it doesn’t bother me as much.  There are many more who have been more successful, but there are unquestionably few who have derived more delight and connection than me.  So, Happy-Sorta-Anniversary to me…may new adventures still greet me each day.  “Life was meant to be lived. Curiosity must be kept alive.  One must never, for whatever reason, turn his back on life.” — Eleanor Roosevelt (and agreed to this day, by me :-)).